The AFS students who were hosted here this year left yesterday for the final time. Saying goodbye was infinitely hard. Everyone but Pong wasn't too bad, sad but not too bad, but Pong was torture. Knowing that she wont be in the room across the hall anymore is torture, knowing that she won't randomly come into my room when she is having trouble concentrating on her homework, or she wont steal my computer because she already broke the one we gave her for her room, or go on long afternoon walks around the bosque because she wants to lose weight, or hold Bubba in her arms so much that he almost forgot how to walk.
She truly became my sister, and I think the hardest part is not knowing when i will see her again and knowing it will at least be several years, after she has been in my life like every second for the past year, its just so weird. And I'm just not really sure what I'm going to do without my sister. We never fought, yeah, there were times we were mad at each other and were frustrated, but we were sisters in the end.
Yesterday was the second worst day of my life, and even though i know my year was worth it, it still sucked. And though saying good bye to Pong (and the other students) was the worst, I also got some bad news.
Maddie told me right before she left that her parents got some news about hosting me; they won't be. They were given some different American girl. This news affected all of us. And we are not so sure of wether or not I still want to go. I mean I do, it will be an amazing year, but some of the security I had before is gone. Like knowing I that I would have a house for one, knowing I would get my own room, knowing i would be in Venice, near where my mom was born, and that i would have Maddie there too. Thats all gone and I'm kinda scared now. What do I do? And my dad sent in the final check last week. I really wanna go, but I'm also scared now.
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